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'The Morning After - Presque Isle, Maine'
The following anecdote arises from about 2010, when I was a pastor in the United Methodist Church.
This appearing, everything in me says, "This should not be." Confusion arises. I am not Catholic or Orthodox; I am a Protestant pastor. We mostly ignore her, while they lavishly adore her. But it is; she is here. I did not invite this, at least consciously.
I am kneeling before this altar, praying quietly before the people after the Eucharistic Rite. And like other times recently, she appears, but not anywhere else - only when I kneel here at this time. Why only here? Why only now?
I do not see her. I sense her - Mary, Mother of Jesus. When she arrives, there is profound clarity in the mind. But what is she? Is this the real Mary in spirit? Is this an archetype of the divine feminine?
After some weeks of her appearing, she does not return. Over the following decade, she has not come back.
Why she came, who knows? What she was, who knows? That she came is what is of importance.
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In the Way, epiphanies arise. We do not need to seek these unveilings of Light - it is best not to. To seek them is a way the ego tries to be in charge. The ego gets thrilled with what it sees to be spectacular; it falsely equates "spiritual" with "exotic." The ego endeavors to accumulate remarkable spiritual experiences, verifying - to itself - how spiritually realized it is. It does not understand these experiences arise naturally from one's communion with Life - even as they naturally disappear back into Nothingness.
The wise person trusts Spirit to manifest to her what and when she is ready to receive the disclosure. To pull something "down" into her experience before readiness for it can bring harm. Stay with the Way, and let the Way show Itself. Do not try to show the Way.
One may not understand a revelation. Understanding may come later. One receives with or without understanding?
Epiphanies arise where we are, yet they point elsewhere. Such a revelation spurs us onward. Such an opening may require years or a lifetime to grow into; in this lifetime, we may never fully grow into any revelation.
Over time, we learn better how to discern revelation from fantasy. These openings remind us to keep exposed to how and where Spirit chooses to show Itself. The eminent Sufi poet Attar, in The Conference of the Birds, pens of this freedom of our Beloved to show Itself to us outside the boundaries others have agreed is allowable -
Sometimes you’re chased away from the Kaaba;
at other times mysteries are revealed to you in a heathen's temple.
Also, we learn to be thankful for the small, daily ways Grace shows Itself to us and through us. We learn to celebrate the revelations of the ordinary. In celebrating these everyday epiphanies, we do not feel a need for spiritual fireworks. We come to see the whole world - earth and sky - is irradiated with Grace.
The sky declares God's glory,
the firmament displays God's artwork.
*Psalm 19.1
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*(C) Brian K. Wilcox, 2020
*Brian's book, An Ache for Union: Poems on Oneness with God through Love, can be ordered through major online booksellers or the publisher AuthorHouse. The book is a collection of poems based on mystical traditions, especially Christian and Sufi, with extensive notes on the teachings and imagery in the poetry.
*The Conference of the Birds. Trans. Sholeh Wolpe.
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